A short time ago I was driving home and I began to think about what I thought I would need to be happy in life, either now, or when I am older.
Here's part of the list
friends
a nice, expensive home in a wealthy neighborhood
a nice, expensive car
a jealousy worthy job
a handsome husband
beautiful children
a beautiful property
riches
a perfect life
expensive clothing
a perfect appearance
a perfect pet
a barn
a lake house
a mountain house
to be high in society
to be invited to all the exclusive social events
Then as I reflected on the list, I realized that a majority of my list was incredibly superficial and I consequently thought about what really matters, and what would really make me happy.
my health
my husband/child's health
my immediate family's health and my relatives' health
friends
a purpose (job, motherhood...)
Then I thought about my some of my friends' families. My old best friend, before I moved to a different state, just had to suffer the sudden death of her healthy, middle aged father. And I pondered how horrid that would be. Then I realized another friend, that I knew from sports also just had her father die after a routine surgery, he died of a sudden heart attack. Then I thought of my dad's best friend growing up. He was divorced and is now remarried, happily, and has a beautiful 5 year old girl. He was recently diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and has been given 3 months to live, and told the survival rate of this particular branch of cancer only- I think it was -5% of the people diagnosed survive it, so he and his wife now know he is going to die. His beautiful little girl will have to grow up without her father. No dad to go with her to father's day at school, no dad to go to soccer practice with, no one to give her away at her wedding and no father-daughter dances. After this depressing thought train, I began to think about my father, and how much I love him. I never quite realized it before, nor did I ever give him the credit, but he is a truly amazing person. And if he dies before his time, I am not sure I would ever recover. He is a big part of me and I love him dearly. He's the one I joke around with, play tricks and pranks on, warm up for soccer games with, I go to for advice about nearly everything, and the one that I get excited about little things with. He's my dad and I know him the way no one else does, because no one has the same relationship with him as I do, not my sisters or mother, only him and I have our relationship.
What do you believe you need to be happy in your current or future life? Examine your list. Do you see any patterns? Is there something/one that you are unappreciative of? Or maybe you made the same realization as I did. In any event, try to reflect on what you have and imagine if you lost it, what would you do? Take the time to appreciate it now.
I recently came across a quote on the subject of things a person regrets not doing now that she/he is older. One of the things was about listening to his/her grandparents ramble on about his/her childhood. This quote made me think, and I realized I really do not know my grandparents as I should. I have forever lived far away from them and thus, I hardly ever am granted the opportunity to spend time with them. So I spoke with my father about his father and I discovered some truly flabbergasting facts. I was then inspired to write a letter to my grandfather asking him about his life and explaining that I wish I knew him better. I am currently working on the letter. I told my dad about my idea and he thinks his father will love it, now I just need the time to write it, and write it correctly. Lesson I learned here: Before you go out to search for a famous person to meet, look first to the amazing people around you. Their stories may just be more interesting than any famous person's life. Look around you at the things commonly glanced over and reevaluate their importance, you may realize how necessary they are to your life.
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2 comments:
What I want in life is to always learn, and spend my time in a worthwhile way.
I want to help. If I'm no good to anyone but myself, then it's a rather pitiful exisistence.
I need to care for others, that's just how I am. It's a phyiscal need.
As for your grandfather, I did very much the same thing when I was a child.
We had do a report on WWII and the Great Depression. I went to the primary source and interviewed my grandfather. I was just a girl then. I recorded it on tapes.
He's gone now, but I still have those tapes, and I am so thouroughly glad I took the time to sit down with him and learn about his life.
He's my hero.
I am the same way about learning. I almost feel like it is a hopeless battle. There is so much I want to learn about, but never enough time to learn it. I feel as though I am racing the clock. There are a bucket load of classes offered at my school and in my community that I would love to take, but I haven't the time to do so. I now understand that I have my entire life to learn. I know that I shall always have to be learning new things, if not from a classroom, then from daily life, my job, family, etc. I am excited about the correspondence with my grandfather because I know that the letters I send and his responses will become dear to me later on when he is gone. I don't want to ever regret not getting to know him. Some of the things he has done are amazing, yet I only know one or two stories from my dad. If I think the stories my dad remembers about his father are amazing, imagine what the stories the actual person tells me will be like!
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